Summary: -As she enters her teens, Shannon is beginning to have concerns about her own body: she's not showing any signs of female puberty and she doesn't quite seem to match the diagrams in biology textbooks -It's also frustrating because she knows Battler likes big-breasted girls -There's a lot of unhappy, worried feelings there because she loves Battler so much and he isn't coming back to Rokkenjima -Beatrice reassures her in an imagined conversation (where she looks quite different from the other memories) but it's not enough -The despair and self-loathing for her body and personality keep building up until she has to do something about it -She decides to start living as a boy, creating "Kanon" as a new servant boy joining the household -She is on close enough terms with Gohda and Kumasawa, the senior servants, that it's easy to arrange this apparent game of make-believe -Kanon has no idea what being male actually is like, so he's winging it in making his personality cold and aloof SINCE THAT'S WHAT BOYS ARE LIKE, RIGHT? -That also makes him a convenient outlet for negative emotions that Shannon can't be -The initial plan is to eventually fade out "Shannon" and fully transition to male -But the end result is that Shannon and Kanon continue to live as alternating selves, with Beatrice as the secret third
8 - body CW dysphoria, depression, suicidal ideation
Summary:
-As she enters her teens, Shannon is beginning to have concerns about her own body: she's not showing any signs of female puberty and she doesn't quite seem to match the diagrams in biology textbooks
-It's also frustrating because she knows Battler likes big-breasted girls
-There's a lot of unhappy, worried feelings there because she loves Battler so much and he isn't coming back to Rokkenjima
-Beatrice reassures her in an imagined conversation (where she looks quite different from the other memories) but it's not enough
-The despair and self-loathing for her body and personality keep building up until she has to do something about it
-She decides to start living as a boy, creating "Kanon" as a new servant boy joining the household
-She is on close enough terms with Gohda and Kumasawa, the senior servants, that it's easy to arrange this apparent game of make-believe
-Kanon has no idea what being male actually is like, so he's winging it in making his personality cold and aloof SINCE THAT'S WHAT BOYS ARE LIKE, RIGHT?
-That also makes him a convenient outlet for negative emotions that Shannon can't be
-The initial plan is to eventually fade out "Shannon" and fully transition to male
-But the end result is that Shannon and Kanon continue to live as alternating selves, with Beatrice as the secret third